I’m… Tired.

So, I’ve been ramping up and speeding up and trying to organize so that I can shift this blog over to a new design and a new domain name. (Yes, for reals! Coming soon!) But one thing keeps coming up for me.

I’m tired.

I look across the blogging web-o-sphere and my mind automatically starts comparing and compartmentalizing. “Oh, this one has that many followers, oh that one writes so cleverly, oh that one is good at branding and marketing” until suddenly I am so small that I look like a mouse and my voice comes out in a squeak. How dare I think I have anything to offer?

I get discouraged because I try to build readership but let’s face it – I’m shooting in the dark. I don’t know what I’m doing, to be honest. I want to market myself, brand myself, speak up for myself, but I look around and get overwhelmed. Everyone else here seems to have it figured out. Me? Well… I’m just one. step. behind.

Until finally looking at it all, I’m so tired that I just want to toss in the towel.

Of course, this means it’s time to lean in. Lean right into that nasty pain that’s whispering insidiously, “You’re. not. good. enough. What makes you think you have anything worthwhile to share?” And keep leaning. Lean forward so far that I fall over the cliff and suddenly I’m flying, out of the nest like a baby bird, flapping my wings and looking socially awkward but hey – I’m keeping myself afloat.

The thing is, I need some air currents to catch my fall.

I’m hoping you can help.Β Listen, I’m stubborn and it isn’t easy for me to actually ask for that heavy word – HELP. It’s a four-letter word after all, and far more damning than any curse. But I’m tired of being tired. I do believe, so deeply and genuinely, that my words are worth it, but I just can’t do this alone anymore. I need you. So I’m asking.

Can you tell me what you’ve done to market your blog? To get your voice out there? To be so audacious and daring and brave as to believe that your words are powerful and deserving of an audience, and then going and getting one? How do you get past the overwhelming feelings that comparison brings up, and what you do on a daily basis to combat it? How do you manage keeping up with your readers through social media? Would you be willing to share your secrets with me? If so, share below or send me an email: bornsirius at gmail dot com.


22 Replies to “I’m… Tired.”

  1. Honestly, the way I market my blog is to go read other people’s blogs and comment. I figure if I want people to take the time to read my words I’d better get out there and read theirs. πŸ˜€

    1. I do quite a bit of that! I follow almost 200 people though, so keeping up with everyone is a little tiring. I’m trying to find a better method of keeping up!

      1. Yeah, me too! Although I realized that if I want to do things outside of WordPress… I had to limit my reading. So I try to read the ones I can when I can but have stopped trying to read them all. If only I could. So much cool stuff. πŸ™‚

      2. Haha yeah pretty much! I keep kinda zoning out and taking internet breaks because keeping up with things is getting too overwhelming. πŸ™‚ Maybe I just need to make it manageable for myself… and yeah it DOES suck because people on here are so awesome!

  2. I’m clearly not great at this whole blogging thing either. I feel like I am at the same place with mine. How do you get more readers? I don’t know. But I adore your blog and I am excited every time I see a new post from you. Please don’t feel discouraged. A few of your posts have made me cry. Your ability to get that kind of response from a total stranger is powerful. You are amazing. Plus, if you stopped blogging who would gush with me over LOTR?

    1. Awwww – thank you, Maurnas. I so appreciate your words! That really helps. I know I”m having a bit of a down day today and that definitely contributes to my discouragement, but I’ve felt overwhelmed about blogging for about a week now, so that helps. It’s good to know at least one person really appreciates it! (I know there are a couple more of you out there too)
      Ohhhh SO TRUE you are probably my favorite person to gush LOTR to… no one else UNDERSTANDS THE DEPTHS of my nerdiness (caps added for drama). I mean, I think I only know one other person who understands why I would have Elvish curses memorized……..

      1. I just bought the extended edition LOTR movies. I’ve been watching them off my computer but I need to be able to play on my computer while watching. So I think I am going to disappear off the face of the Earth for a few months.

  3. Honestly I do very little. I comment on others that is about it I tried twitter but I’m rubbish at it. I have another about music I share that via Google+ cos it is on blogger and easy. I’m not about making money out of it it is just an open journal I set no expectations so it is no issue any comment is a result for me as someone has read that is success enough.

  4. Secret: We ALL feel like this!! Like everone has it figured out but us! I am fumbling my way through just like you, and I truly believe the only way through is to just not give up. Your voice IS valuable. That is the truth. Popularity does not equal sincerity or quality, just look at the latest celebrity gossip or Hollywood Blockbuster! Just keep going my friend and keep learning about yourself in the process xxx

    1. Oh Sarah – bless you and thank you for reminding me I’m not alone. It feels so lonely sometimes throwing your words out there and hoping someone gets what I’m saying.
      And thank you for reminding me of the truth of popularity! It doesn’t help that I’m in a weird crossroads in my life where I’m changing direction and so I want a basket to throw all my eggs in, so to speak. But maybe popularity isn’t necessarily the best one. I mean, this is about the journey! Learning myself, as you said…
      I think about you often… I hope you are well. Looks like you are having fun in Guatamala, I am following your Facebook and planning fiendish schemes to get to Central/South America myself! Thanks so much for stopping by today, your words were so encouraging to me.

  5. Write about what you love, what’s interesting to you, whatever you feel passionate about. Follow other blogs that move you and like and comment. There are natural marketing gurus out there, but I’m not one. I write because it’s an outlet or space to be creative and connect with others. It turned into this huge reward, but it built slowly over time. This has been my experience, anyway. You write beautifully and your’re funny and smart. There’s always an audience for that πŸ™‚

    1. Thanks for sharing your experience! That means a lot. I’m leaning in that direction… I’m trying to have some kind of middle ground. I want to market it… but I do not ever want to lose writing about things I love – trauma and addiction recovery, being 25, travel… stuff that’s close to my heart.
      Thank you for your lovely compliment! πŸ™‚ So sweet of you… I always enjoy your writing myself, it’s so fun to have both an in-person and an online recovery community. Thank you for sharing your experience, in this comment and on your blog!

  6. Everyone has said exactly what I would’ve said. Speak from your heart and write what you love. Always be yourself just like in the real,world because that’s how you get your followers. I’m here whether you write daily,weekly or monthly because I love hearing from you. I do think a huge portion of it is relationships, but I too have a hard time keeping up. So you have to figure out what works for you. It’s just not possible to read everything. I have some faves (like you) that I do read it all, even if it takes me time to get there. I have others that I try to read all, but if I can’t, I read at least one that week. Some post so often it’s just impossible to keep up.

    And I like what Sarah said. We all feel this way. Sometimes it feels like high school all over. And again, I come back to be yourself. We love having you here. And I have something coming your way soon too. πŸ™‚

    Oh and as far as branding, I find that I’m constantly evolving. What I started a year ago with my expat blog has changed drastically. Brand it based on you and your voice because that will always stay the same. That’s probably not helpful. Lol

    1. Deanna, bless you, my lovely friend. This was so helpful for me. It’s just encouraging to know that my voice is lovely and inspiring to others just as it is. Thank you. And I feel the same on yours; I don’t always get to it right away, but I do read it all! I love what you write.
      I definitely just can’t keep up with everyone. Some people post so much that it’s overwhelming, so I just try to read the highlights. Still I wonder if I should be doing more or something different. Who knows, I guess.
      I’m excited for whatever it was you have coming my way… if it was the thing on Facebook, i’m THRILLED! Totally made my day today… it’s going on my gratitude list tonight πŸ˜€ ❀
      I'm excited to do my big reveal soon… need to get some graphics organized and then going to unwrap it all πŸ˜€ But it is DEFINITELY based on me and my voice which makes me super thrilled about it!!!
      love to you!!!

  7. You have no idea how common this feeling is! In fact, THIS post helped ME today, because I’ve been totally overwhelmed lately. And Yes….tired. It is a lot of time-consuming reading to keep up with something you love to do. Sometimes I feel I’m taking time away from my family to read blogs, or time I’m supposed to be spending editing, and then I feel guilty. It’s a constant struggle with balance, and I desperately try to not compare. I’m a young blog, so I try not to hold my expectations unrealistically high. I just want to write for fun and enjoy myself. I go through dry spells just like everyone. I agree so wholeheartedly with Deanna and Sarah! Well, everyone who commented actually, but especially them.

    Bottom line: do NOT give up. You belong in the blogosphere!!

    1. Beth, thank you!!! Thank you so much for acknowledging that I’m not alone in this. It helps so much to know that I’m not the only one with blogger world overwhelm. I want to balance it well you know? You definitely called it with the constant struggle with balance. I have a hard time because while I love, love, love writing, and will do it no matter what, I do want to monetize my blog a bit. That’s a really hard balance to find! I don’t want to be so overwhelmed I start hating it!
      Thank you so much for your words; and I extend them back to you – don’t give up! You belong here, too!! ❀

  8. I sit here overwhelmed as well and wonder how much longer I can keep everything I want to do up and work and be a mom and be a wife and hang out with friends and sleep now and then. My blog started as just a way to get stuff out that I didn’t want to burden my friends with. People seemed to connect…if followed those who followed me and started visiting other blogs like mine and commenting. Now I love to promote others and do that by doing duets with them… I connect my blog to twitter and all the other social media sites so I only do things once. Keep writing…I am glad I found you. We stick together and promote those we enjoy and let the rest take care of itself.

    1. Thanks hasty… And thanks for coming by. I so appreciate your support. It honestly makes this whole thing a bit more bearable. I’m with you… I think we just do what we can and let the rest sort itself, but I’m so glad we all bonded together. Your words are beautiful, too… so enjoy reading as a fellow poet. Have a lovely rest of the weekend my dear.

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