I have another post coming soon, and this post will likely be a bit raw. But I felt the need to share it tonight.
This evening, I’ve been thinking about the words “come with me” and “return.” I hear them not only in English but in Spanish… “Conmigo. Volvere.” These words have been bouncing around in my heart since last night. I have had a rough couple of weeks with long hours at work, family reunions, and an emergency trip to see my best friend. All things I wouldn’t trade for the world, but I’m tired.
I’ve been thrown off, away from myself. Fear has rocked me like a ship on the ocean. I’ve lost myself in the maelstrom. Anxiety has been a path I’ve worn well. So last night I went for a hike in the woods to one of my favorite spots. It was time to re-center or drown.
I heard that whisper. “Come with me. Conmigo.”
It brought me to tears. I am hearing it everywhere right now. There’s a line from Lord of the Rings:
“Lasto beth nin, tola dan nan galad” – Listen to my voice, come back to the light.
Come back to the light.
Return.
It just now struck me that I call my writing page “Resilient Audacity.” Resilience is bouncing back…
To me, resilience is RETURN.
To return to the core, the essence of myself that has always been there. The light that shines at the center of myself.
“Conmigo” is from a Neruda poem –
“Oh tú, la que yo amo,
pequeña, grano rojo
de trigo,
será dura la lucha,
la vida será dura,
pero vendrás conmigo.”
“Oh you, the one I love
little one, red grain
of wheat
the struggle will be hard
life will be hard
but you will come with me.”
This hearkens back as well to my favorite spoken word of all time that I posted about here a couple months ago: Andrea Gibson’s The Nutrionist.
I heard another poem by her recently and it said,
“You don’t have to leave to arrive.”
The Universe so softly, lovingly, wonderfully whispers to me: to come with, to return to the light. The one that’s been there waiting for me all along.
I hope youre feeling better now, Laurie.
Side note: It’s awesome that youre quoting Lord of the Rings in your post.
Response to side note:
It’s kind of embarrassing/AWESOME how much I love Lord of the Rings… and how much Elvish I know.
If it makes you feel any better, I knew a guy in high school who owned a Klingon dictionary.
This post captures a very subtle sort of feeling, and one I have also felt. Do return, Laurie.
Side note: I can feel it in the air tonight.
Couldn’t resist.
I will, Aussa. 🙂
and bahahaha 😀 you are my favorite person right now!
Ha okay so I was in a meeting this morning and for some reason it was brought up that, apparently, Phil Collins just donated the largest private collection of Alamo artifacts to The Alamo in San Antonio. Apparently he had some insanely huge collection in the basement of his Switzerland home. How weird.
HAHAHA coincidence? 😉 I THINK NOT! 😀
When you get going, take me with you.
Nothing like being sick in bed as I am right now to make your inner struggles come out and stare you in the face.
Ugh I HATE being sick and having to stare struggles in the face. That is the worst. I’ll send you some of my “return” juju ❤
“You don’t have to leave to arrive.” Powerful stuff right there.
So agree.